The Aftermath of Forgiveness…

Just like other things in life forgiveness is a process. It requires more than the actual action of forgiving. Like apologizing, forgiving is just the beginning. When someone hurts you, the level of hurt all depends on your reaction to the person’s behavior. The more you love someone, the more pain they potentially can cause. The problem I am having when it comes to forgiveness is meeting the person where they are now. When I decide to forgive someone, I decide to let go of the past. I decided to let go of the pain they caused and whatever negativity came with them. Pain is not only caused by people who don’t love you, but it can come from those who do. So what happens when those people resurface or re-enter your life? We all have the choice to have certain people around us but sometimes there are those who are always around, like close family. It is imperative within the process to let go (forgive) the past behaviors of the individual, and meet the person they are presenting to you right now. I’m starting to believe that I have PTSD, not a severe case, but one in which circumstances trigger negative thoughts and response from me. the behavior of the other individual may just be similar to what has occurred before and leads me to assume an outcome or create my own negative scenario. Everything around us changes, including people. Most people have the desire to evolve and have learned lessons from their past mistakes. Create a clean slate within your mind, that allows you to create new memories with them, as opposed to the pain and hurt of the past. To forgive is the emotional commitment to let go for not only the pain of another but for your emotional wellbeing. A commitment requires a level of work that many of us don’t acknowledge necessary. To forgive is the first step, but there is work in the aftermath. Work that requires you to let go of what you thought you knew about someone, and to be open to who is standing in front of you today!


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