I am not your enemy

In the celebration of the new release of the film “Girls Trip”, I found it important to touch on an issue that affects women of color. In the African-American community, we struggle when it comes to being united in circumstances such as building. Today, as opposed to when I was growing up, the love for melanin and embracing our uniqueness has truly blossomed. I sometimes wish I grew up in this era (so I would have never been fooled by the just for me commercial). We have come a long way in the community and promoting self-love, but our relationships amongst each other still are in need of improvement. In my personal experiences and still until this day, black women and I repeat not all, disconnect through a competitive mindset. This weekend I linked up with a friend I went to high school with. I haven’t seen her in years but opened my home to her as she was attending an event here in Philly. Years have gone by, and we both have two different backgrounds, and upbringing but realized the importance of sisterhood and the lack of it within our own people. I mean while Mona-Scott Young is making millions on the negative views of Black women (we all don’t act like that), socially we have a huge disconnect amongst our culture. Don’t get me wrong, I watch ratchet tv from time to time, but for weak-minded individuals, they can easily be influenced. I have a group of girlfriends, all women of color, and professionals with different upbringing and views on life. Even though we all are extremely busy, we take the time to get together and empower each other in some type of way. Many black women are single raising children alone, and no girlfriends to talk to or receive support. We, the new generation need to acknowledge that this is an issue, and begin to change this competitive mindset. We were taught that good black men are scarce, that we have to work harder to obtain certain positions, and being independent is the way to be. Don’t get me wrong, independence is important, but not to the point where you are turning down help when needed. I say this because I am so guilty of this very thing. It is great that you got your own, however when it comes to success, there will be people along the way that will contribute to supporting your goals. Good black men are not scarce, so there is no need to try to take someone elses man( although I don’t believe in the whole ownership in relationships). This is one of the major reasons black men engage in the foolery they do, because there is women out there willing to try and compete. When you learn something or obtain knowledge and resources, help to educate others. You teaching others what you learned doesn’t take from you. You become resourceful. It is our job as beings to endure trials and share our stories of resilence and tools we have utilized along the way. Instead of calling each other “bitches” and being judgemental, take the time out to have a positive conversation. Then you will realize that many of us share the same story. We are denying ourselves of relationships and building within our communities because of this competitive mindset. There is enough abundance for us all! Next time you see a black woman, whether she is looking down or is rocking a new hairstyle that complements her stop, and say hello!Smile and acknowledge her presence and make it aware that we are not in competition. Give her a smile a non-verbal way to let her know that I am not your enemy. #buildingsisterhood

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