Trust begins with self. Self esteem, self-confidence, and self-awareness are the building blocks to trust. Once you have conquered these within yourself, the trust you have built within will be projected on the relationships you build on the outside.  Trust begins with self because we have a choice. The problem is that with certain relationships, people don’t believe or understand they actually do have a choice. One thing that seems common in situations with women’s health and fetal loss is the trust factor. In healthcare, trust is extremely important when seeking a physician. You trust that they will provide you with confidentiality and the best possible treatment. A lot of times, patients  place an extensive level of trust into healthcare providers, to the point where they lose their inner voice. A physician only understands you, through you. Your diagnosed by the symptoms that are visible, and by the symptoms you have communicated to the physician you have personally experienced. Self-awareness is important in this case because we as women should be mindful and aware of how our body works. Monitor intake and output, menstrual cycles, and also important our emotional state. Pay attention to what works for your skin and how your body reacts. You should be aware of what is not “normal” to you. During my 5k run for stillbirth awareness, there were signs with short facts about stillbirth. One that stood out to me was that 90% of women knew something was not right. That is a high percentage. Many women, including myself, experiencing childbirth and pregnancy the first time place extensive levels of trust in physicians. I’m sure you have seen the movies where the women gets extremely upset because her normal doctor is sick or unavailable. She wants someone who knows her medical history and one that she trust.

The issue lies when an individual’s degree and certificates, clouds your judgement or trust within yourself. I don’t care how long someone has been in practice, every patient is different. Situations may be similar, but all patients are different. Many women, especially first time mothers, place that extensive level of trust in physicians. Trust in which sometimes clouds their own judgment about their own needs and desires. Treament options, birthing options, and self-care are all things very rarely discussed or talked about. Doctors today have a bunch of patients, so remembering everyone  and who wants what can be difficult. So as patients, it is important to ask questions. If you don’t feel like something is right, ask for more testing or resources for answers. As women our voices are silenced through ego because of the fear that one is more intelligent than the other. Any individual with a higher level of education understands that there is always an opportunity to learn something new. It’s unfortunate when I had encountered this situation, I did not push to understand the information that was provided to me. I just stood by their word in my trust, at that time. This does not just apply to fetal loss but also anxiety and depression. I hate to say this but hospitals and doctors offices have become primarily business. More focused on the financial as opposed to the well-being and options for the best treatment for their patients. This is not all but many. Anti-depressant medications amongst women are being handed out like candy on Halloween. Women or patients are not being provided with alternative options. Anyone that has ever tried a diet pill knows it requires some level of work from you. You may need to change you eating habits, exercise, or lifestyle to enhance to ability of the pill to work for you. Same goes for other medications. Our bodies are our internal compass, they alert us when something is wrong. Trust yourself enough to challenge your physician, and have a health plan or goal for yourself. When pregnant ask questions, and create a birthing plan you see fit for you. Don’t silence yourself or health needs, due to the intimidation of one’s degree. The more trust you have within yourself, the better choices you will make about your life and the life you carry. Asking questions, raising awareness, and expressing concerns can save a life. It may be your first time, but it is the physicians first time working with you. #trust #youaretheteacher



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